Thursday, July 01, 2004
As my birthday approaches, I find myself reminiscing about birthday clubs. I remember with great fondness receiving my invitation to enjoy a free clown cone at Baskin Robins every year. The colorful postcard would show up in the mailbox a few days before my birthday, and since it was practically the only mail I ever got, it was pretty exciting. Why are we forced to give up the free clone cones at the age of twelve? Why can't I still receive postcards offering me free things because of my birthday? Just because I'll be turning 23, and get mail on a fairly frequent basis doesn't mean we couldn't change up the mail routine with a birthday offer now and then. Credit card offers just aren't the same, you know?
So in my nostalgic whimpering I have done something which even I must admit is quite foolish. I have searched online and signed up for a few, fairly pathetic substitutes for the 12 and under birthday club. I was in a state of delirium and can't quite recall what all I signed up for, although I do recall being quite disappointed at my options. Basically if you're under the age of thirteen you get sent all kinds of super cool free things no questions asked, however if you're old, like me, you get sent free shipping offers or, 10% off your next purchase offers. Woo Hoo! Color me Celebrational! Really, I'm not all that bitter. I'm just starting to realize that all these places will now be sending me junk emails throughout all eternity. Not a particularly exciting prospect considering the fact that I already have 129 new messages in my email. I'm not kidding...none from any individual person. All from faceless corporations. Perhaps this gives you an idea of the kind of person I am, obviously the kind of person who gives out my email address way too frequently at the prospect of receiving some really cool free or discounted thing. The problem is, and keep in mind I'm only just now realizing this, there are no really cool free things.
That's sad.
How can we live in a world where you really do get what you pay for?
Is that the kind of world we want to be a part of? I guess so, but why?
